I am filled with... Joy

I am filled with joy for...
All the evil in the world
All the good in the world
All those I have yet to meet in the world
All those I have met in the world
All the bad sensations in this world 
All the good sensations in this world
All the rules in the world
All the words that come out of my mouth in the world
All the words that come out of everybody else's mouth in the world 
All the stars and sun and sky etc in the world 
All the mathematics in the world
All the shapes in the world 

Sigh
Even when you're trapped in the maths death world there can be so much fun and joy

But even then I am still not content
There is something that eludes me that is outside of words or shape or rules
There is something like a doom Shadow above me 
I cannot touch it or know it
And it annoys me greatly 
Every day my frustration grows deeper
So the petty animal thrashing gnashing desperation or fear in its cage wants to know its jailer
Even outside of expression
Elusion to ecstasy illusion to silence fuck
By knowing you I am forced to comprehend outside the limits of comprehension
After all this time when will I meet you again decider decider decider

(Maths death world = mostly the computer)

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